Let's Hear It for "Miklovic"

Found this in my email this morning:

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From: miklovic
To: jimhrubik@earthlink.net
Subject: [The Sayings of Grandpa Jim] New comment on Who's the Funny Man?.
Date: Feb 28, 2008 4:19 PM
miklovic has left a new comment on your post "Who's the Funny Man?":

Iam a member of Miklovic family that has theirs roots in Hlozany. One of my grandfathers relatives lives Hlozany in 1930 and immigrate to Canada. Now I am trying to get to contact with Miklovic family from Canada if you could help me.

Posted by miklovic to The Sayings of Grandpa Jim at 4:19 PM

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Unfortunately, I don't have much information on Uncle John's family, and I can't very well ask him since he's dead. Maybe Grannie Annie can fill in some details. And ... "miklovic" did not leave an email address, and has nothing besides his name in his Blogger profile.

Crustmasters INC

OK, put this together with Tuzia Tootle's fresh-ground whole wheat flour. Let is raise over warm water 1-1/2 hours, then rolled into loaves and let it raise to double (again over warm water).

• 2 tbsp dry yeast


• 2 cups water


• 1/2 cup milk


• 1/4 cup sugar


• 2 tsp salt


• 6-1/2 cups flour

Baked 30 minutes at 375.

Taste test when it cools, but the crust sounds OK when it is thumped. Loaves about 4" high out of a 4-1/2 x 11 pan.

Time for Survival Camp

I see that my ordinary readers are somewhat weak-stomached, or else afraid that I might ask them whether they had actually tried their recipes. I have not tried any of these. I did have an episode of brain flatulence in which I decided I should run a little "survival camp" for my grandkids. They can learn to make fire by rubbing sticks together like I did when I was a kid. Maybe the graduation present from survival camp could be a Grandpa-built survival knife?

Anyway, found these little blurbs. For the squeamish, bug eating is Biblical. I really am not interested in an all-insect diet; I will leave that to the bats and shrews. I did find a place that said the best way to prepare grasshoppers was to kill them (freezing or heating them up, either works), break off the wings and big jumping legs, grab the head and remove it with the thorax shield and whatever insides come out (sort of like cleaning crayfish, but from the opposite end) to remove the crunchiest, stick-in-the-teeth stuff, and then cook. Maybe grilled? Cooking of bugs is recommended, since they can carry parasites. Eating raw is OK according to the experts (!!!) but is not the best practice.

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Grasshopper Fritters

¾ C. flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
¾ C. milk
1 egg, slightly beaten
1 C. grasshoppers
Sift flour, baking powder and salt together into a bowl. Slowly add milk and beat until smooth. Add egg and beat well. Pluck off grasshopper wings and legs, heads optional. Dip insects in egg batter and deep fry. Salt and serve.

(from http://entweb.clemson.edu/k12/recipes.htm)

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How to Prepare Insects for Cooking

Those who are accustomed to eating animals probably know that most animals must be killed, cleaned, and cooked before one can eat them. The case is similar with insects. While there are many people in other countries who prefer to eat insects live and raw, and while it is true that you could probably get the most nutrients that way, I prefer food that won't crawl off my plate. I have tried eating live ants and mealworms, and in fact present a "recipe" for live insect consumption below; however, I would advise that beginning insect eaters start with cooked insects.

To prepare a batch of crickets or mealworms:

Take the desired quantity of live insects, rinse them off and then pat them dry. This procedure is easy to do with mealworms, but fairly hard to do with crickets. To do so with crickets, pour them all into a colander and cover it quickly with a piece of wire screening or cheesecloth. Rinse them, then dry them by shaking the colander until all the water drains. Then put the crickets or mealworms in a plastic bag and put them in the freezer until they are dead but not frozen. Fifteen minutes or so should be sufficient. Then take them out and rinse them again. You don't really have to clean mealworms, though if you want, you can chop off their heads. Cricket's heads, hind legs, and wing cases can be removed according to personal preference; I like doing so, since cricket legs tend to get stuck in your teeth. You are now ready to use the insects in all kinds of culinary treats!

(from http://www.eatbug.com/recipes.htm)

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Mealworm Fried Rice

Ingredients:

1 egg, beaten
1 tsp. oil
3/4 c. water
1/4 c. chopped onions
4 tsp. soy sauce
1/8 tsp. garlic powder
1 c. minute rice
1 c. cooked mealworms
Directions:

Scramble egg in a saucepan, stirring to break egg into pieces.
Add water, soy sauce, garlic and onions. Bring to a boil.

Stir in rice. Cover; remove from heat and let stand five minutes.

Chocolate Chirpie Chip Cookies

Ingredients:

2 1/4 cup flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
1 cup butter, softened
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 cup brown sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
2 eggs
1 12-ounce chocolate chips
1 cup chopped nuts
1/2 cup dry-roasted crickets
Directions:

Preheat oven to 375. In small bowl, combine flour, baking soda and salt; set aside. In large bowl, combine butter, sugar, brown sugar and vanilla; beat until creamy. Beat in eggs. Gradually add flour mixture and insects, mix well. Stir in chocolate chips. Drop by rounded measuring teaspoonfuls onto ungreased cookie sheet. Bake for 8-10 minutes.

(from http://www.ent.iastate.edu/misc/insectsasfood.html)

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Garlic Butter Fried Grasshoppers

1/4 cup butter
6 cloves garlic, crushed
1 cup cleaned insects*

Melt butter in fry pan. Reduce heat. Sauté garlic in butter for 5 minutes. Add insects. Continue sautéing for 10 - 15
minutes, stirring occasionally. From Orkin

(from http://www.faculty.de.gcsu.edu/~cbader/ghprecwithinsects.html#Appetizer)

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Other reading:

http://ohioline.osu.edu/hyg-fact/2000/2160.html

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That is what people learn to do in college.

Now back to baking bread.

Man Shall Not Live BY Bread Alone ...... and the Government shall regulate it ...

This from FOX News...
U.N. Conference Promotes Insect-Eating for Everyone From Famine Victims to Astronauts
Sunday, February 24, 2008 (AP)

CHIANG MAI, Thailand — Crickets, caterpillars and grubs are high in protein and minerals and could be an important food source during droughts and other emergencies, according to scientists.Water Bugs and Chilis -- YUM!!

"I definitely think they can assist," said German biologist V.B. Meyer-Rochow, who regularly eats insects and wore a T-shirt with a Harlequin longhorn beetle to a U.N.-sponsored conference this month on promoting bugs as a food source.

Three dozen scientists from 15 countries gathered in this northern Thailand city, home to several dozen restaurants serving insects and other bugs. Some of their proposals were more down to earth than others.Ant Egg Omelet -- Quite the delicacy.

A Japanese scientist proposed bug farms on spacecraft to feed astronauts, noting that it would be more practical than raising cows or pigs. Australian, Dutch and American researchers said more restaurants are serving the critters in their countries.Fried bamboo worms. Take a wok on your next Shuttle trip.

The U.N. Food and Agriculture Organization estimates 1,400 species of insects and worms are eaten in almost 90 countries in Africa, Latin America and Asia. Researchers at the conference detailed how crickets and silk worms are eaten in Thailand, grubs and grasshoppers in Africa and ants in South America.Fried grasshoppers. Is a guard necessary?

"In certain places with certain cultures with a certain level of acceptance, then insects can very well be seen as part of the solution" to hunger, said Patrick Durst, a Bangkok-based senior forestry officer at the FAO.

The challenge, experts said, is organizing unregulated, small bug food operations in many countries so they can supplement the food that aid agencies provide. [my bold/italics] The infrastructure to raise, transport and market bugs is almost nonexistent in most countries.

Prof. Arnold van Huis, a tropical entomologist known as "Mr. Edible Insect" in his native Netherlands, blamed a Western bias against eating insects for the failure of aid agencies to incorporate bugs into their mix.

"They are completely biased," van Huis said. "They really have to change. I would urge other donor organizations to take a different attitude toward this ... It's excellent food. It can be sustainable with precautions."

There are questions about the safety of eating bugs and potential dangers from over-harvesting them, said Durst, who became interested in the practice known scientifically as entomophagy during his years working in Bangkok, where crickets and bamboo worms are sold as food by street vendors.

Tina van den Briel, senior nutritionist at the World Food Program, the U.N. agency that provides food in emergencies, expressed doubt that insects can benefit large, vulnerable populations. Most bugs are seasonal and have a short shelf life, she said.

"They can be a very good complement to the diet," said van den Briel, not a conference participant. "But they do not lend themselves to programs like ours where you transport food over long distances and where you have to store food for a few months."

She suggested a more practical benefit might be adding insects to animal feed or crushing them into a meal powder that could be used to make cookies or cakes.

Meyer-Rochow said aid agencies might even find a way to harvest crop-destroying swarms of locusts and crickets.

"These mass outbreaks could be a valuable food source," he said. "If the technology is available, they could be ground up like a paste and added to the food humans eat."

I can see it coming. Grasshopper guacamole. A special UN Bug Hunting License if you want to kill grasshoppers. A tax on the caterpillars eating your veggies. Laws requiring equitable distribution of bugs. "I-Check" for all bugeaters in Ohio, just to make sure there are no stray emissions when you chomp down.

Recipes, anyone? Send them in!!

Doughn't!

This is a bit disappointing. The mix contained only yeast, water, sugar, salt, and flour, and the bread tastes good. It was baked at 350 for 35 minutes, and the crust is lighter in color.The problem I have with it is that it is too crusty. Maybe the milk helps give it a chewier crust. Next batch will go back to adding milk, and the baking will again be at 375 for 30 minutes. Possibly also drop the flour back to 6-1/2 cups.

Also, this time I did not roll out the dough and roll up the loaves; that is the reason, I think, for the "warty" looking crust.

Ah, well, failures are meant to be eaten. Try hanging that sign anywhere but in a kitchen.

Dough's Up!

Just a few minutes left to punch-down time.

2 tbsp dry yeast
2-1/2 cups water
1/4 cup sugar
2 tsp salt
7 cups flour (it was plenty stiff at this point, so I stopped at 7)

Rolling in the Dough

Bread is one of those interesting chemistry experiments you can eat. Making bread helps keep the house warm on cold winter days. It is also significantly cheaper than buying agglutinated crumb material. So, in the interest of science, and the betterment of my belly, I began experimenting with bread recipes.

The first attempts were with standard recipes from the Betty Crocker Cookbook. I also played with my darling wife's bread recipe. Somehow, I was not altogether pleased -- I like a soft bread, that is chewy and not too crusty. Something that is springy, and doesn't break up into crumbs that easily ...

So I began with the Sweet Roll Dough recipe from Betty & Co. :

2 tbsp dry yeast
1 cup water
1/2 cup milk
1/4 cup sugar
1 tsp salt
2 eggs
1/2 cup shortening
6 cups flour

Except that I ended up using about 8 cups of flour. All of the above thoroughly mixed, raised twice, and baked for 30 minutes at 375. The result was edible. Four loaves that were very heavy and cakey. It took almost a week and a half to eat them, with a loaf of store-bought bread thrown into the test period (not everybody is fond of my experimentation).

Next attempt -- 21 February 2008. The first batch was not the best bread in town. Too heavy. Tended toward crumbling. I theorized that the grease and egg were the main culprits. Try number 2 :

2 tbsp dry yeast
2 cups water
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup sugar
2 tsp salt
6-1/2 cups flour

The amount of flour was what was left in the bucket, and I was too lazy to go upstairs and get more. Baked 30 minutes at 375. I figured on kick-starting the yeast with the extra sugar. No eggs, no grease. Rubbed some shortening around the inside of the metal salad bowl I used to raise the dough in, though. The result :Very nice!! Two BIG loaves. (Maybe too big??) Crust is just a bit dark, but the bread is chewy, tender, somewhat sweet, and toasts very well and is not at all crumbly. I like!!

But, those who know me know I am hard to satisfy. Therefore I plan to tweak the recipe just a bit more :

2 tbsp dry yeast
2-1/2 cups water
1/4 cup sugar
2 tsp salt
8 cups flour

Above to be baked 35 minutes at 350. Probably a four loaf batch. I figure this recipe will need to be tried tomorrow, because the current batch may not be long for this world.

Ride, Suzuki, Into The Sunset

The prominent Canadian, Dr. David Suzuki, has stated that that politicians who speak out against human-caused global warming should be punished with fines and jail time (Jail politicians who ignore climate science: Suzuki).

"It's an intergenerational crime in the face of all the knowledge and science from over 20 years."

Meanwhile, back at the solar system, (The Sun Also Sets), it seems that there is some concern that we are headed into a prolonged cooling period, possibly like the Little Ice Age of the Maunder Minimum. For history buffs, that was the period in the mid-1600's when the world went through some very cold years; stories about the freezing over of major rivers like the Hudson and the Thames and the Ohio abound. And, about 400-500 years before that was another extended cooling period, which caused the Norsemen to abandon their farming settlements in Greenland and Vinland. (Jah, you t'ink maybe d'ere vass a reason to call d'ere place GREENland?). As the astronomical clock goes, the cuckoo may be about to pop.

There is a good case to be made that atheism is merely a recycled paganism of a sort. The atheist will claim that he does not believe in God, but in actuality, he is his own god (and frequently sees himself "at one with nature"). If he needs a devil, the person who disagrees with him will fit the role well. Of course, the atheist will hotly deny such a charge, especially those most closely entwined in scientism.

There is a difference between science and scientism. Science is an activity; a means of examining the world, forming ideas about how and why things work, testing to see if those ideas are viable, and if so, using those ideas to help predict the outcome of certain activities. Science has been practiced at some level of sophistication throughout human history, and has coexisted with every form of religious belief and practice.

Scientism is a belief system, that all things can be explained and predicted in an orderly manner by the application of science. The phrase "Deo volente" is the greatest taboo in scientism.

It is because of the truly human nature of science that it is naturally attractive to the atheist. In the cloak of scientism (the synthesis of science and atheism), the atheist takes current observations and projects them backwards in time to generate his own creation myths. The practitioner of scientism sees mankind as the apex of evolutionary development, and inheritor of the responsibility for maintenance of the universe (though why this should be so is hard to explain, since he has no one to answer to but himself, and within a century he will be raw material for a new, random evolutionary experiment). Therefore, as an article of faith, he accepts the responsibility for the future of the universe, and, doubting nothing, produces a roadmap for human conduct into the future. As surely as Thor and Zeus and Ra ordered human destiny by their whims, he must also sacrifice to nature in the ordinances of his faith; the sacrifice of a pious practitioner of scientism causes much orderliness. One sect even had as its motto, "Alles in Ordnung". Hence the rabid ferocity of Suzuki, Gore, et al.

On a more practical level, it can be seen that the sacrifices required by the practitioners of scientism are nothing less than the rites necessary to retain power over others. Rush Limbaugh has commented that it is humorous to watch liberals become frantic as they suspect that they are losing their power over others. It is tragic, however, when the practitioners of scientism, whether atheistic or theistic, see their domains crumbling. It is also dangerous. The abortion issue, the debate over embryonic stem cell research, the ethics debate over "assisted suicide"; all illustrate quite aptly the proclivity of the practitioners of scientism to invoke human sacrifice, just as their pagan ancestors, as a necessity for satisfying natural progress.

A study of the Galileo affair shows that it was not heresy involving the basic tenets of the Roman Catholic church that got him into trouble, but the production of instruments and observations that flatly contradicted the theistic scientism of his day. If it were still acceptable to burn heretics at the stake, would Suzuki be satisfied with fines and jail time?

Persona non Grata

Today I got my come-uppance. Again. Things are very slow, and I have been putting in applications to various and sundry places based on what the job description is and whether I feel it is something I am capable of doing. So far, I have been getting rejections.

As I told Mike this afternoon, I have never gotten a job, that I can recall, without either knowing the people doing the hiring, or being the last person on the list that they could possibly tap. My very first (real) job, as a carry-out and stockboy at Emery's Sparkle Market, I got because Paul Emery knew my folks, and Esther Emich (who basically ran the office) knew me from Sunday School. I was hired by Bert Joyce because he knew me from the time I was a little kid. I was hired by Myers (Patch Rubber) because Uncle Bill ran Patch Rubber and Dad ran the Cement House. I was hired by Akron U (GTA) because Ed Lasher knew me from one of his classes and recommended that I apply for the position in his Educational Resources Center. I was hired by Gary Lubliner at the Norton Radio Shack as a part time salesman because he knew that I knew more about the Color Computer than anybody else in the area at that time -- Radio Shack had refused to hire me earlier because I failed their psychological profile in the application process. I was hired by H&R Block as a part-time tax preparer because the course instructor got to know me, and my cousin Dan was running their computer system. I was hired at REAS because Megan Hall Harbath and Chuck Cather knew me and the sort of work I did; Jim Beatty flat out told me during the interview that he wouldn't even have considered my resume without their recommendation.

I was hired by Midview Local Schools because they were desperate and needed a science teacher with less than a month to go to the beginning of school. Same situation with North Union Local Schools. I was hired by Indian and Northern Affairs because it was only a week until school started and all three of the other applicants had turned the job down after seeing where it was located (and even Violet cried all the way back to Edmonton from Green Lake because Beauval was so far away from civilization). During my second year there, Cliff Samoleski told me that they had broken down and hired me because they had no other options.

I interviewed with quite a few brokers, but only Dave Kaufman would take a chance on me; he knew my background. It took years of trying before Dale Sungy showed up to offer me a chance to complete my experience requirement for state certification, but he was also in need of help and did not have the time to waste on a trainee who had not yet gotten the necessary education and some of the required experience. Besides, for both of them, it was a low risk thing; if I didn't produce, I wouldn't get paid. I am not sure why AMCO hired me, but the risk was low; again, I was paid as a contractor on a per review basis. I was recommended for the MAD appraisal board by Dale, and Joe Harrison remembered me from our days together in ROTC (his first words to me when I answered his phone call -- "Are you the Jim Hrubik who was in the Counterguerrilla Unit at Akron U?")

Every place I have left, I left with people telling me that I had done a good job, and/or writing letters of recommendation and reference. I have lots of those in my files. I have never been let go from a job because of my performance. Today one of those little suspicions jumped out and got my attention.

I filled out an on-line application for part-time work at Lowes. You don't even get a chance to interview if you fail to meet the minimum requirements they check in the on-line questionnaire, not even if you do it inside a Lowes store. So... gotta be honest, right?

Q. (Y/N) Have you ever stolen or shoplifted anything?
A. (Y). When I was about 10 or 11 years old (about 50 years ago!), we used to lift small items from the Ben Franklin store down at Wooster Hawkins. Years later, I looked up the last Ben Franklin in the area to offer to make that right (and the manager thought it was funny that I would do so).

Q. (Multiple Choice) In the last three years, have you violated safety regulations while doing your job?
A. (D - 5 or more times). Actually, I can't count the number of times I walked onto new home construction sites without a hard hat or steel toed boots. I don't always put jackstands under my car when I have to change a tire or the oil, and I rarely wear safety goggles while sawing or drilling.

Q. (Y/N) Do you have a criminal record?
A. (Y). Ah, that surprised you? Remember Matt's science project in 2000? The geese he hatched and raised? I was charged with illegal possession of a wild animal. I plead "No Contest". In front of the game warden, the judge told me I should have performed a public service and killed the geese. He had no choice but to find me guilty. A misdemeanor. I have a criminal record.

Lowes ; "SORRY, BUT YOU DO NOT MEET OUR MINIMUM QUALIFICATIONS'.

Well, I will keep applying and sending out my resume. Someday, somebody who knows me will have a need for my skills and the rest won't matter.

Only 5% Guilty...

I really do get a kick out of some of these stories. It gives you a peek into unvarnished human nature.

Small Romanian Town Gets Rich Through eBay Scams



Notice that the thing that draws the victims in is a chance to get around the rules. This is nothing new; the Nigerian 419 scams were around even before there was a World Wide Web -- back in the days of text-only browsers and email.

So I got curious and decided to check out what was going on in the heart of Darkest Africa. (Every now and then I still get a 419 come-on in my SPAM box). Wudjano, there is a site called 419Eater!!

This almost looks like fun to my slightly twisted mind, but I really do have better things to spend my time on. Reading it might be instructive, though for Internet Innocents.

Careful there, kiddies; this may be a job for Superman.

PPhtt...

This just in ...

"Middle school issues ban on intentional flatulence



So I raised my hand and said, "Ms Libby, those boys aren't using deodorant, either".

They Have More Sense t'Other Side of the River?

Hoo, boy!!

West Virginia considers gun lessons for schoolchildren...